第一篇：從“虎媽”身上看好媳婦標準

從“虎媽”身上看好媳婦標準

2015年05月15日

導語：《虎媽貓爸》的熒屏熱播一度讓子女教育話題被推上風口浪尖，而在討論“虎媽”教育式的同時，洋溢在《虎媽貓爸》中間的家庭地位與生活氛圍往往被大眾所忽視，趙薇飾演的畢勝男作為母親十分強勢，但是作為媳婦，畢勝男具備了諸多優點，畢勝男與婆婆孫雅嫻的對手戲也成為了婆媳關系的范本，從虎媽身上看好媳婦的標準，是值得借鑒的。

1、上得廳堂，下得廚房

從“帶的出去，帶的回來”的媳婦標準，到“上得廳堂，下得廚房”，無疑后者更受歡迎。畢勝男開篇作為職場麗人，對外不僅可以各種商業公關，對內家庭事項也是打理得井井有條。畢勝男在各個場合的穿衣打扮，無論是職場裝還是生活著裝，都可以作為30歲女人穿衣典范。再從她為丈夫和女兒做的一手好菜來看，畢勝男絕對是“上得廳堂，下得廚房”的好媳婦代表。

2、充當好婆家娘家關系的潤滑劑

如果說羅素的“甜言蜜語”巧妙化解了婆媳之間的矛盾，那么畢勝男也是作為婆家娘家關系的最好潤滑劑。在父母來到家里之后，娘家和婆家對子女的教育觀念分歧、生活習慣差異所帶來的矛盾愈演愈烈，甚至到了砸盤子吵架的地步，但是畢勝男的“服軟”有效化解了矛盾，最終在自己任勞任怨地為婆家打掃衛生的“苦肉計”下，讓嚴厲苛刻的婆婆最終妥協，雙方都用愛讓家庭關系更牢固。

3、生活上獨立自強能照顧家庭

從嚴格意義上來說，畢勝男不是啃老族，性格的獨立自強，經濟上的省吃儉用，畢勝男即使在辭職失業的情況下，依舊可以勒緊腰帶過日子。相比于好吃懶做又啃老的媳婦，婆家就算把經濟大權都交到畢勝男手里，應該也是放心的。

4、有自食其力的本領

畢勝男作為社會成員經歷了三個階段，一個是職場成功階段，一個是辭職失業階段，一個是再度復職階段，從中可以看出，無論是轉換環境還是失業在家，畢勝男有自食其力的本領，羅家并不是娶了個大小姐回來，這樣的媳婦其實最接地氣。

5、肯為家庭犧牲 一方面照顧到子女上學，一方面減輕婆家負擔，在事業上正風生水起的主管辭去工作，在家當起全職媽媽，這是需要勇氣的，畢勝男愿意為家犧牲，這樣的媳婦也能讓婆家放心。

6、有孝心，照顧老人的感受

孫雅嫻是個好面子的婆婆，在她與其他中年婦女在一起的戲份中就能看出來，在對方攀比子女、攀比媳婦工作的時候，孫雅嫻是心生不快的，然而畢勝男每次適時地出現在她身邊，在外人面前表現得親密無間無疑是給足了孫雅嫻面子的，即使是表面文章，婆婆也是十分歡喜的。

7、能以適當方式化解婆媳矛盾

畢勝男和孫雅嫻因為茜茜的教育問題時常出現矛盾，但是畢勝男在處理上十分冷靜，首先在婆婆“吃了火藥”爆發時候，是好言相勸和溫柔安慰；等事情過去之后，主動道歉并以“媽媽，有家蛋糕店味道很好，我帶你一起去喝咖啡”的理由雙方坐到一起冷靜商量，最終讓婆婆接受她的看法。有態度、有方法、有情感，在這一點上，媳婦畢勝男做得堪稱完美。

需要維護一個家庭的方式有很多，不僅僅涉及到“虎媽”教育問題，婆媳關系、夫妻關系，不同成員間的家庭關系也都需要悉心維護，這才是“家”的題中之義。

第二篇：虎媽·觀后感

在《好孩子是虎媽式教育培養出來的嗎？》這個視頻中，爭論雙方圍繞如何培養孩子的問題，從“好孩子是否是虎式教育培養出來的”、“父母該不該替孩子做主”以及“刻苦打基礎還是快樂成長更重要”三個方面展開了多角度論戰。其中我最感興趣的是“父母該不該替孩子做主”。我的觀點是，在教育方面，在孩子還沒有辦法認清自我的時候，父母應該負責任地、理性地替孩子做主。首先，讓我們先梳理一下對“父母該不該替孩子做主”這一問題持否定態度者的基本觀點。大部分持否定觀點的人主要出于以下幾點考慮。一是，每個孩子都有自己的長處，父母應該做的是順應孩子的興趣，引導其走向成功；二是，對于孩子應該接受怎樣的教育、應該怎樣學習這樣的問題，如果父母替孩子做主，那么孩子便失去了自由選擇的空間，這可能導致孩子被迫做不情愿的事情，進而影響孩子的心理健康；三是，如果父母事事替孩子做主，那就可能導致孩子獨立面對問題的能力低下，進而可能導致孩子成年后面臨多種困難。反對者的考慮不無道理，但是他們之所以反對父母替孩子做決定，其實多少都是出于一種假設——父母做出的決定常常不符合孩子自身的情況，甚至有些偏執武斷的父母將自己的功利的想法強加于孩子的身上。這個不理性的做法當然不能提倡。但是，不管孩子是否已經具備獨立做出判斷決定的能力，就貿然堅持所謂應該順從孩子的興趣，這樣的做法其實存在太大的不確定性，是一種武斷，更是一種為人父母的不負責任。更進一步的是，反對者認為應該順從孩子自己的興趣，但是如果孩子其實不知道自己真正喜歡的，真正想要的是什么，那反對者的觀點又有何意義呢？事實上，反對者們的觀點只能存在于這樣一種假設之下，即孩子們自己知道自身的興趣并且會有明確的追求，但是，這樣的設想其實與已有的心理學研究是相矛盾的。根據艾里克森的人格發展階段理論，人的人格發展分為八個階段，其中第五個階段是人生最重要的階段，該階段要解決的問題是自我同一性的建立。他指出，這個時候人才真正認識到自己是怎樣的人，才能形成明確的自我概念①，而這一階段處于人的青少年階段。換言之即是，在青少年階段，孩子的興趣愛好會和其意志一同形成合力，朝向明確的自我方向發展。因此，盡管有極少數例外，盡管艾里克森的研究成果不一定是金科玉律（雖然事實上他的這一理論是目前該領域認可度最高的），但是對絕大多數人來說，在青少年階段之前期望孩子自己朝著自己的興趣堅持追求其實是不具備生理理論基礎，不現實的。那不能單單順從孩子的興趣，難道父母替孩子做主就是好的選擇嗎？難道這一做法不會到來其他的負面影響嗎？當然，不顧孩子自身情況（包括其生理發展階段特征、其性格特點以及在生活中表現出來的興趣等），單純拍腦袋決定或者隨波逐流浮躁地決定孩子的發展方向肯定是不可取的。同樣地，艾里克森在其人格發展階段理論的第三階段（3~6歲）指出，這一階段，孩子總希望被允許去進行自主活動，且如果父母經常否定他們的要求，或完全強迫他們完成父母指定的任務，他們就會變得沒有自主性。因此，我支持在教育方面，在孩子還沒有辦法認清自我的時候，父母應該負責任地、理性地替孩子做主。一方面，此時孩子正處于渴望自主活動的階段，其表現出來的多種活

動自然會帶上其興趣的烙印，會反映其天賦所在。在這個時候，父母應該認真負責觀察孩子的表現，想辦法了解孩子的真實感受，然后進行必要的分析，幫孩子找出其興趣和天分所在，為孩子做出一份科學的規劃，為孩子“做主”。接下來便是實施的階段，在這一階段中，理性顯得尤其重要。父母要用客觀理性地態度看待自己為孩子做出的決定，觀察孩子的反應，適時對孩子做出恰當的鼓勵、教導和規范或對規劃做出必要的調整。總結起來，在孩童時期的教育方面，父母與其讓孩子游蕩在極其不確定的、靠他們自己那點也許連他們自己都未必明了的興趣中，還不如自己真正擔起教育的責任，科學規劃科學對待，幫助孩子鋪設一條更加明朗的道路。

參考文獻

唐紅波.心理學.廣州：廣東省語言音像電子出版社, 2009

第三篇：虎媽教育

As more Chinese parents adopt a Western style of parenting that allows children more freedom and encouragement, Amy Chua and her book lauding strict Chinese parenting as superior ignited unprecedented attention among Americans.如今，提倡給予孩子更多自由與鼓勵的西方教育模式越發受到中國家長的追捧，而華裔“虎媽”蔡美兒在新書中卻稱贊嚴厲的中式教育更為優越，從而在美國人當中引發空前關注。

Chua made the cover of the latest issue of Time Magazine, continuing to provoke heated discussion among Americans over her alleged Chinese parenting methods including no grades lower than A, no sleepovers, TV or computer games.蔡美兒前不久成為最新一期《時代周刊》的封面人物，此舉進一步激起美國民眾對其所倡導的中式教育的持續熱議，她推行的教育方式包括不準有科目低于A，不準夜不歸宿，不準看電視，不準玩電腦游戲。

As many in the US became furious at her “ruthless” way, asking “where is the love and respect for children,” some are wondering whether the Chinese approach creates smarter people who can take the lead in the future global marketplacea Harvard dropout.在中國學術界，許多人也在反思中國式的教育方式，似乎中式教育無法培養出像“哈佛輟學生”比爾?蓋茨這樣的具有創造思維的人才。

“In my opinion, compared with highly strict Chinese parenting, the Western way exerts more positive influence on children`s mental health,” said Cui Yonghua, a leading psychiatrist at Beijing Anding Hospital.北京安定醫院精神病主治醫師崔永華稱：“我認為，與極其嚴厲的中式家教相比，西方教育方式對孩子心理健康會產生更多積極的影響。”

Cui pointed out that many Chinese parents now focus too much on children`s IQ development and physical health but little on their mental health.And it`s not good for parents to protect their children from every pressure and discomfort.崔永華指出，現在許多中國家長過分注重孩子的智商發展以及身體健康，反而忽略了孩子的心理健康。此外，家長保護過度孩子，使他們與壓力絕緣，不讓他們受委屈，這也是不好的。

“Parents should believe that children are able and flexible,” he said.他說：“家長應當相信孩子的能力，他們能屈能伸。”

第四篇：關于虎媽英語作文

Dear parents,Recently, a controversy arose over Amy Chua, the tiger mother.I’m writing to you to explain my ideas about your educational method, which is quite similar to the Tiger Mother’s.I know what you have done for me is all in favor of me.In fact, it worked out quite well.People always compliment me and regard me as a witty and intelligent girl as a top student.You take pride in it and so do I.However, I can’t cheer up, for you are much too strict with me.You don’t allow me to watch TV except the daily news broadcasting.But you don’t know various programs can broaden my horizons.And I know how to control the time.What’s worse, you forbid me to take part in after-school activities, thinking it’s a waste of time.But do you know it’s of great benefit to make me an all-around student? Another thing that makes me unsatisfied is that you force me to practice playing the violin, despite knowing I’m crazy about painting.Under the pressure of you, I have to study harder and harder, with my freedom and happiness becoming less and less, of which you aren’t aware absolutely.Instead of forcing your ideas and choose on me, you are

supposed to discuss with me in detail and then determine.Instead of generalizing, you should respect for the law of my growth.In contrast to being under a severe strain, I’m sure to do better with reasonable freedom.At last, I’d like to show you my thanks for your love all the time.But do remember I’ve already grown up and had my own mind.Please teach me with a more permissive attitude.Only in this way will I do the best in turn.Yours sincerely,daughter

第五篇：虎媽英文讀后感

Reaction to Battle Hymn of Tiger Mother Recently, I have finished a book called Battle Hymn of Tiger Mother.The book reveals the author experienced a course of raising two children and parenting experience.The author compares herself to a tiger mother.Lost in thought, I want share my ideas with you.The author Amy Chua, a Chinese-American, Harvard University, bachelor of arts and doctor of law, the Yale university professor.Approximate the sheep in Europe and the relaxation education situation, Ms.Chua in Chinese parents' high expectations and strict parenting to two children.At the start of reading, I didn’t quite understand why Amy is so cruel with her daughters.The rules she made are so strict and even unreasonable.Her daughters are not allowed to: ? attend a sleepover

? have a play date

? be in a school play ? complain about not being in a school play

? watch TV or play computer games

? choose their own extracurricular activities

? get any grade less than an A

? not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama

? play any instrument other than the piano or violin

? not play the piano or violin.With deeper reading, I found I misunderstood her.Amy’s strict is her love to her daughters.After the book published, it caused a heated debate about education thought idea.Most western and eastern mothers hold completely different idea about it.Amy Chua’s requirement to her daughters seems too rigorous in American people’s eyes, but from the perspective of Chinese parents, it’s just ok.I think one of the reasons why western Mothers are different from the eastern, is that the different culture and environment.In my opinion, the west countries are more advanced than the east in many ways.So the huge disparity may make the eastern mothers feel anxious.As a result, they would be stricter with their children to make them excellent.Traditional Chinese mothers always hold high hopes for their children.The kids are required to learn many things like piano or math, even at a

very

early

age.American education special emphasis on respect for the child, often give children the right to choose.As a result, many children will choose to give up very easily.We should not completely criticize Amy.Though her second daughter hated this cruel mother, her two daughters won’t have today’s achievement without her strict education.Finally two children are outstanding, their learning and music are both excellent, is the envy of achievements, locally known as music child prodigy.There’s no doubt in Amy’s dedication and devotion in educating her children.Every time her daughter was practicing piano, she was always there to company, though Amy had a lot of work to do.She devoted herself in parenting.So she really loves her two daughters but in a different way.Amy writes: “Become an expert, actually there is no fun at all.Any skills to master

must pay the hard work.And from the nature of children, never love.Therefore, the beginning don't give them opportunities to choose don't work hard, it becomes crucial.” Don't give kids opportunities to choose don't work hard, this is her core parenting thought.It equals to help them to work hard, so they can achieve more and become more excellent.Her strict demands teach her daughters how to concentrate on doing something and also develop them persistent and will quality.Actually, every mother has their own way of parenting.There is no the best method, but the most suitable.Just as an old saying goes, no leaves are exactly the same.Tiger mother tell us the way that she do is effective , but this may have effective are not suitable for everyone, every child's personality has different, parents should according to the actual situation of their children in accordance with their aptitude.Different kid has different situation.But we can learn some useful experience from Amy Chua.Most young children like playing, it’s not their nature to work hard or be concentrated.So parents should give some force to help their children in learning.And parents should also learn to keep persistent, as parenting is really a hard and long way.Parents are the guide and light of their children.To learn how to parent well, first be strict with themselves.Truth to tell, my mother is not a tiger mother.She is not strict, and didn’t require me to achieve something.As a consequence, I grew up in a relaxing and comfortable environment.I don’t have any stress or force.She never forces me to do or not to do something.One day I joked my mother why she was not very strict or that I would become better.However, I didn’t take my study easy, but work hard.Because I realized study is students’ primary mission.I take my own example to improve that study is not all parents’ duty, but ours.You can not totally criticize parents when their child didn’t behave well in their study.In a word, I think Amy Chua is a good mother, though she is very strict.But she just did a mother could do to help children become more excellent.She really knows how to educate children.Her daughters will very appreciate it when they grow.So these words are my own opinions, some of them may be not right, but exactly what I want to say.One thousand readers, there are one thousand Hamlet.