第一篇：淺談小學(xué)英語(yǔ)作文的修改

淺談小學(xué)英語(yǔ)作文的修改

泗涇小學(xué)張玉莉

在小學(xué)階段，大部分英語(yǔ)教師都非常注重學(xué)生的聽(tīng)、說(shuō)和閱讀能力的培養(yǎng)和訓(xùn)練，往往忽視了寫作能力的訓(xùn)練，認(rèn)為這是中學(xué)的要求，或者是因?yàn)橛X(jué)得寫作教學(xué)難，教師修改學(xué)生英語(yǔ)作文也難，因此一般對(duì)閱讀理解較重視，而對(duì)寫的重要性認(rèn)識(shí)不足，忽視學(xué)生寫的能力的培養(yǎng)。可是英語(yǔ)寫作卻能喚起學(xué)生對(duì)所學(xué)或所掌握的語(yǔ)言的感覺(jué)，讓他們更好地將這些語(yǔ)言知識(shí)進(jìn)行實(shí)際的運(yùn)用和鞏固。隨著英語(yǔ)教學(xué)的改革，現(xiàn)在英語(yǔ)作文在我們小學(xué)階段尤其是高段來(lái)說(shuō)，顯示出的地位越來(lái)越重要，這勢(shì)必要求我們的小學(xué)英語(yǔ)教師要提高相關(guān)的能力，如自身的寫作能力，指導(dǎo)寫作的能力等等，同時(shí)不可忽視的是采用有效的修改英語(yǔ)作文的方法，幫助學(xué)生在寫作方面更快更好地進(jìn)步。英語(yǔ)作文的修改，是通過(guò)師生、生生信息互動(dòng)，使學(xué)生的英語(yǔ)作文逐步完善。那么，有哪些較好的修改英語(yǔ)作文的方法呢？

一、教師要言傳身教，嚴(yán)格把握好英語(yǔ)作文的修改關(guān)。

1、對(duì)于初學(xué)英語(yǔ)作文的學(xué)生，教師要詳細(xì)修改他們的每一篇作文，從單詞拼寫、語(yǔ)法、邏輯安排方面全面修改，讓學(xué)生知道該怎么寫，在寫英語(yǔ)作文的起始階段先解決語(yǔ)句的準(zhǔn)確性和邏輯的合理性，指出學(xué)生普遍性錯(cuò)誤，提醒學(xué)生注意；鼓勵(lì)學(xué)生同一個(gè)意思用不同的表達(dá)方式，為學(xué)生今后寫好英語(yǔ)作文打好基礎(chǔ)。修改學(xué)生的英語(yǔ)作文時(shí)，教師應(yīng)注意發(fā)掘?qū)W生英語(yǔ)作文中的優(yōu)點(diǎn)并給予肯定和鼓勵(lì)。學(xué)生作文完成之后，他們往往不了解自己文章的不足之處，這就需要教師在旁邊地悉心指點(diǎn)。學(xué)生文章好在什么地方，不好在什么地方，一定要講得具體而明確，可以將相關(guān)的評(píng)語(yǔ)寫在學(xué)生的作文旁邊，對(duì)于學(xué)生能看懂的語(yǔ)句可用英文，如：This sentence is wonderful!You can watch the things carefully.但對(duì)于學(xué)生看不懂的語(yǔ)句教師可以結(jié)合中文批注。

2、面批。就是讓學(xué)生拿好自己寫的作文，在規(guī)定的時(shí)間內(nèi)向教師請(qǐng)教。此時(shí)教師不需要逐詞修改，而是提出其作文的問(wèn)題所在，并附上自己的修改建議（這些建議只是提供給學(xué)生一個(gè)參考，允許他們按照自己的想法修改，前提是保證語(yǔ)句通順，邏輯合理。）。然后，讓學(xué)生根據(jù)教師的修改意見(jiàn)，再一次結(jié)合自己的想

法進(jìn)行修改。這種方法有助于培養(yǎng)學(xué)生傾聽(tīng)的良好習(xí)慣，同時(shí)有助于培養(yǎng)他們的記憶力與理解力，更為他們的修改作文提供了一定的自主空間，能夠讓他們較好地發(fā)揮自己的個(gè)性。當(dāng)然這種方法對(duì)于學(xué)困生來(lái)說(shuō)有一定難度，因此教師在面批他們的作文時(shí)要降低要求，最好輔以文字幫助。

3、分析例文。以上兩種方法采用的是一對(duì)一的方式，但在修改作文的過(guò)程中我們也不妨用一用集體修改的方法，那就是分析例文。

例文的選擇可以是多方面的，教師可以選擇優(yōu)秀的范文，集體展示欣賞。在學(xué)生仔細(xì)閱讀后，能談?wù)劮段牡膬?yōu)點(diǎn)，尤其是從語(yǔ)句、邏輯安排方面入手，幫助學(xué)生在欣賞范文的過(guò)程中進(jìn)一步了解小學(xué)英語(yǔ)寫作的要求。緊接著讓學(xué)生對(duì)照自己的作文，尋找差距；然后依照“缺什么補(bǔ)什么”的原則，重寫自己的作文（當(dāng)然可以將自己作文的優(yōu)點(diǎn)保留下來(lái)），在重寫的過(guò)程中讓每一位學(xué)生都有所進(jìn)步。

另一種例文的選擇，是選擇一些存在著有明顯問(wèn)題的作文，讓每一位學(xué)生從寫作要求入手，找一找例文有哪些問(wèn)題。當(dāng)然找錯(cuò)只是初步要求，重點(diǎn)還是在讓學(xué)生提出正確的修改方法，在修改的過(guò)程中可以刺激學(xué)生更好地掌握該方面的知識(shí)，避免自己犯同樣的錯(cuò)誤。

在采用這種修改作文的方法時(shí)，還要注意：對(duì)于范文，要注上學(xué)生的姓名，這樣也是一種表?yè)P(yáng)的方式，也可促使其他學(xué)生努力，爭(zhēng)取自己的作文也能早日被展示欣賞。而對(duì)于那些問(wèn)題作文，千萬(wàn)不要表明作者的身份，最好是不要選擇本班學(xué)生的作文，跨班選擇，以保護(hù)學(xué)生的自尊心。

二、下放修改英語(yǔ)作文的權(quán)力，讓學(xué)生嘗試修改英語(yǔ)作文。

我們往往發(fā)現(xiàn)學(xué)生在寫英語(yǔ)作文的時(shí)候缺乏積極性，忽視自己在學(xué)習(xí)上的主體性。要改變這種局面就要重視學(xué)生的主體性，把修改作文這一任務(wù)交給學(xué)生，讓學(xué)生參與到整個(gè)英語(yǔ)作文活動(dòng)中，樹(shù)立修改意識(shí)，培養(yǎng)寫作興趣，變“要我學(xué)”為“我要學(xué)”，從而徹底改變英語(yǔ)作文教學(xué)的被動(dòng)局面，有效地提高學(xué)生的英語(yǔ)作文能力。

1、學(xué)生自改作文。顧名思義，就是學(xué)生自己修改自己的作文, 對(duì)自己的文章進(jìn)行完善。當(dāng)然，在修改之前，教師首先要讓學(xué)生明確修改要求，如：主題是否突出；內(nèi)容是否充實(shí)；邏輯是否合理；是否有語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤或拼寫錯(cuò)誤或用詞不當(dāng)。然后讓學(xué)生默讀，用不同顏色的筆在自己作文初稿上進(jìn)行修改, 對(duì)其中疑

難問(wèn)題可向教師請(qǐng)教。

但是這種方法對(duì)于一部分學(xué)生效果不佳，他們總是找不出自己作文的問(wèn)題出在哪里。怎么辦呢？我從朗讀中找到了靈感，當(dāng)學(xué)生用心而富有感情地朗讀一篇文章時(shí)，他們往往能找到朗讀過(guò)程中出現(xiàn)的問(wèn)題。因此，在學(xué)生自改作文時(shí)，我要求他們讀出聲音，而且要求讀三遍左右，在反復(fù)朗讀中學(xué)生較容易找到自己作文的問(wèn)題，然后進(jìn)行修改和完善。

2、學(xué)生互改作文。俗話說(shuō)“三個(gè)臭皮匠賽過(guò)諸葛亮”，“眾人拾柴火焰高”，在學(xué)生有了一定的英語(yǔ)寫作基礎(chǔ)后，特別是對(duì)高年級(jí)學(xué)生來(lái)說(shuō)，教師不能總是手把手地修改他們的作文了，而是應(yīng)該提供給他們一定的空間和時(shí)間，讓他們互相修改作文，在修改他人作文的過(guò)程中，可以幫助學(xué)生打開(kāi)思路，獲取更多的信息，也讓他們?cè)谧约旱男∪后w中互相幫助，共同進(jìn)步。同時(shí)學(xué)生在互改作文的過(guò)程中，對(duì)寫作及其修改有更深入地認(rèn)識(shí)，了解成功寫作的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，并且可促使學(xué)生對(duì)自己的寫作負(fù)責(zé)。同時(shí)還可節(jié)約教師的修改作文的時(shí)間。

互相修改作文，可以是同桌、伙伴或小組進(jìn)行，每一位學(xué)生除了自己的作文不修改外，對(duì)于群體內(nèi)他人的作文都要進(jìn)行閱讀——修改——提建議。

此處需要注意的是：教師對(duì)于人員的分配一定要有所調(diào)控，使每一個(gè)組合中都有不同層次的學(xué)生，讓優(yōu)等生幫助學(xué)困生，在助人為樂(lè)中感受成功；讓學(xué)困生向其他學(xué)生學(xué)習(xí)，一步一個(gè)腳印地成長(zhǎng)；讓中等生尋找差距，迎頭趕上，使自己的作文水平更上一層樓。同時(shí)教師還要注意定期改變組合內(nèi)的人員，因?yàn)闀r(shí)間久了，學(xué)生會(huì)因?yàn)槿狈π迈r感而產(chǎn)生惰性。

采取這種互相修改英語(yǔ)作文的方法，也可以形成一種語(yǔ)言意識(shí)。學(xué)生既是作者又是讀者、修改者，他們通過(guò)批評(píng)性地閱讀修改別人的作文，可以學(xué)到更多的寫作知識(shí)和技巧，他們會(huì)時(shí)刻留心語(yǔ)法及用詞錯(cuò)誤，以后在自己寫作時(shí)他們會(huì)開(kāi)始想到的是讀者（而非教師），因?yàn)樗麄兊淖魑囊媒o教師以外的同學(xué)去閱讀修改，可以促使他們?cè)趯懽魑臅r(shí)對(duì)自己和別人更加負(fù)責(zé)。

三、游戲、競(jìng)賽輔助，讓修改英語(yǔ)作文也富于樂(lè)趣。

說(shuō)實(shí)話，修改作文實(shí)際上是滿枯燥的，怎樣使這枯燥的工作有點(diǎn)樂(lè)趣呢？我嘗試著搞一些游戲競(jìng)賽活動(dòng)。

如“I’m a teacher.”，讓學(xué)生報(bào)名成為小老師，然后他（她）有權(quán)指名

修改其他同學(xué)的作文，讓他們感受一下做老師的榮耀。

如“擴(kuò)充”游戲，給學(xué)生一個(gè)單詞，先讓他們把它擴(kuò)充為一個(gè)詞組，然后是一個(gè)句子，apple--a red apple--a big red apple--I want a big red apple.--My mother and I want a big red apple.--My moyher and I want to buy a big red apple.從而讓學(xué)生真切地體會(huì)到什么叫寫具體。

還有“糾錯(cuò)大賽”，教師提供給全班學(xué)生若干篇英語(yǔ)作文，讓全體學(xué)生進(jìn)行閱讀找錯(cuò)比賽，將錯(cuò)誤找出并能正確修改者才能得分，對(duì)于不同層次的學(xué)生評(píng)分要求也是不一樣的，最后選出能手獎(jiǎng)（優(yōu)等生）、優(yōu)勝獎(jiǎng)（中等生）、進(jìn)步獎(jiǎng)（學(xué)困生）等，既讓學(xué)生感到了獲獎(jiǎng)的快樂(lè)，又為他們修改好一整篇作文奠定了基礎(chǔ)。

總之，一種好的、有效的修改作文的方法，能為學(xué)生更好地寫好英語(yǔ)作文起到事半功倍的作用。教師要會(huì)集思廣益，充分運(yùn)用身邊的資源，發(fā)揮自己和學(xué)生的力量與作用，讓修改作文也變得輕松一點(diǎn)。

當(dāng)然修改英語(yǔ)作文的方法很多，我還在不斷地實(shí)踐、尋找一些更為有效的方法。

第二篇：英語(yǔ)作文修改

A Trip to the Zoo孩子的原稿：

Yesterday way Sunday and it was a fine day.So I take a trip to the zoo.I went there by bus, I get there at 8:00 am.There are many people.and some people watched the tigers ,some watched the monkeys, Others watched the bids,I saw many animals and I tool many phtos.That’s a interesting trip.I’ll never forget it.That’smy trip.修改后：

It was a sunny SundayAfter a quick breakfast , I couldn’t wait to get on the bus.This is my first time to enjoy a trip alone.Varions lovebal animals are waiting in the zoo!

As soon as I got there,I was attracted at once.Monkeys were climbing in the tree happily.Sometimes they even came to fetch the bananas in visitors’hands.How naughty they were!What’s more, I was also intersted in the tigers.They are called “the king of animals”,but at this moment they were lying quetly ,maybe they were sleepy.Animals ,humanbeings ,we live in a world.we are family.I t came to my mind immiediatly.Anyway, I had an interesting trip today.It gave me a deep impression, I’ll never forget it.My favourite season

孩子的原稿：

There are four seasons in a year.And my favourite season is summer.Although it’s very hot.I still love it.Because I can swim in the sea.And lie in sun.That’s very comfortable.And I also can eat some Icecreams.they are delicious so there’re lots of thingd to do in summer.That’svery intersting.So I love summer.That’s my favourite season.修改后

My favourite season

As is all know , there are four seasons.Speaking of my favourite , summer comes first although it is hot.Many things can be done in summer such as swimming in the sea, Lying on the beach… How comfortable!More importantlyI can eat delicious Icecream.Of course, we also enjoy beautiful views outside.And I’m always looking forward to going fishing with my father.In a word ,summer is my favourite season because it brings me a lot of happiness.

第三篇：英語(yǔ)作文-修改

The Changes In My Life

Since I entered junior middle school, I became hastier, because I am afraid to be surpassed by others.I am under stress every day.I did not only feel very tired,but also did not achieve what I have ever expected.I felt very confused and thought nobody could help me.Until one day, my head teacher asked me “What do you see out of the window?”.“Many students,” I answered with a little curiocity.“Yes, you are right.But do not you see flowers?”she asked with a smile.“You should slow your pace and enjoy every moment”, she turned away after saying these words, just giving me an expressive smile.I stood there seeming to understand something.Yeah, she is right.I often crossed the school in a hurry and hardly ever noticed the flowers which was blooming in the corner.Maybe I really need to slow my pace, and slow my heart.Now, I am in Grade Nine, the most important year during my junior middle school, but I do not feel very nevious and anxious.This is just because I can enjoy my life, enjoy every step I have taken.This is the biggest change in my life!

Na.2013.10.02

一些基礎(chǔ)的表達(dá)要注意，尤其是詞性和拼寫。

另外，文章時(shí)態(tài)的處理請(qǐng)注意，記敘過(guò)去事件和描述現(xiàn)在情況要在時(shí)態(tài)上有所體現(xiàn)。

第四篇：2010高考英語(yǔ)作文 已修改

2010高考英語(yǔ)作文范文：金融危機(jī)下大學(xué)生就業(yè)

當(dāng)今我國(guó)大學(xué)生就業(yè)成功率很低，除了全球性的金融危機(jī)影響外，還有就是大學(xué)生對(duì)工作的選擇。有的人認(rèn)為應(yīng)該優(yōu)先選擇自己喜歡的工作，而不是自己擅長(zhǎng)的;另一部分人相反。你班學(xué)生就此事進(jìn)行討論，請(qǐng)客觀地介紹情況并談?wù)勀愕目捶ā?/p>

觀點(diǎn) 理由

一部分人 喜歡比擅長(zhǎng)重要。興趣是最好的老師，精通與擅長(zhǎng)的可能性會(huì)大大增加等。

另一部分 擅長(zhǎng)比喜歡重要。擅長(zhǎng)更容易成功，后天努力培養(yǎng)興趣。

你 ????

注意：1.短文須包括所有要點(diǎn), 可適度發(fā)揮。

2.開(kāi)頭已為你寫好, 但不計(jì)人總詞數(shù)。

3.詞數(shù):120左右。

Recently the students in our class have discussed the following topic: which is more important for college graduates to choose jobs, being interested in it or being good at it?___________________________________________

Recently the students in our class have discussed the following topic: which is more important for college graduates to choose jobs, being interested in it or being good at it?

Some agree that the love of job is very important because interest is the best teacher.People are often willing to do what they like doing.If you are not good at it in the beginning, you can work hard and gradually improve your skills to make you good at it.Others hold their view that if you are good at it, you have more chances to achieve success very soon.While you work, you can do all you can to gain the interest in it little by little.From my point of view, I think we should make full use of our strengths to change them each other regardless of the fact that you like it or you are good at it.2010高考英語(yǔ)作文范文：低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)下的環(huán)境保護(hù) 低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)下的環(huán)境保護(hù)(1)

“低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)”是一個(gè)具有廣泛社會(huì)性的經(jīng)濟(jì)前沿理念，最早是在2003年英國(guó)政府發(fā)布的能源白皮書《我們能源的未來(lái)：創(chuàng)建低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)》正式提出的。低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)包括低碳發(fā)展、低碳產(chǎn)業(yè)、低碳技術(shù)和低碳生活等經(jīng)濟(jì)形態(tài)，是指在不影響經(jīng)濟(jì)發(fā)展的前提下，通過(guò)技術(shù)創(chuàng)新和制度創(chuàng)新，降低能源和資源消耗，盡可能最大限度地減少溫室氣體和污染物的排放，實(shí)現(xiàn)減緩氣候變化的目標(biāo)，促進(jìn)人類的可持續(xù)發(fā)展。

Protection of Environment

1.目前環(huán)保還存在著許多問(wèn)題。

2.為了保護(hù)環(huán)境，3.各國(guó)政府做了大量的工作。

4.我的看法。

There are still many problems of environmental protection in recent years.One of the most serious problems is the serious pollution of air, water and soil.the polluted air does great harm to people’s health.The polluted water causes diseases and death.What is more, vegetation had been greatly reduced with the rapid growth of modern cities.To protect the environment, governments of many countries have done a lot.Legislative steps have been introduced to control air pollution, to protect the forest and sea resources and to stop any environmental pollution.Therefore, governments are playing the most important role in the environmental protection today.In my opinion, to protect environment, the government must take even more concrete measures.First, it should let people fully realize the importance of environmental protection through education.Second, much more efforts should be made to put the population planning policy into practice, because more people means more people means more pollution.Finally, those who destroy the environment intentionally should be severely punished.We should let them know that destroying environment means destroying mankind themselves.低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)下的環(huán)境保護(hù)(2)

根據(jù)題目《師父被熏暈過(guò)去了》的漫畫和下面要求寫一篇關(guān)于河水污染的感想。

1.情況。2.原因。3.后果。4.措施。

詞數(shù) 100~120。

One day Sun Wukong together with his master and brothers was walking across a river.Suddenly his master fell off the horse by the bad smell of river water.They found the water so dirty that they could hardly breathe.A lot of factories along the river always poured their waste water and rubbish straight into the river which made the river water polluted.In this way most of the fish in the river were killed.If the river water all over the country is polluted like this, no living things will exist in the water.Now more and more people have come to realize how serious this problem is.Our government is doing her best to take measures to fight against pollution.We expect that the water in every river will be made cleaner and cleaner before long.低碳經(jīng)濟(jì)下的環(huán)境保護(hù)(3)

全世界的環(huán)境問(wèn)題在變得越來(lái)越嚴(yán)重。請(qǐng)你根據(jù)漫畫內(nèi)容和下面要求給China Daily寫一封信反映這一情況，并提出保護(hù)環(huán)境的建議。

注意：1.信的開(kāi)頭與結(jié)尾已經(jīng)給出，不計(jì)算在總詞數(shù)內(nèi)。

2.字?jǐn)?shù)要求: 120左右。

人口膨脹population expansion;過(guò)度開(kāi)發(fā)overdevelopment。

Dear editor，Environmental problems are becoming more and more serious all over the world._________________________________________________________

Yours truly

Li Hua

Dear editor，Environmental problems are becoming more and more serious all over the world.With the development of industry and agriculture, cars make great noises and give off poisonous gas.Because of population expansion and overdevelopment, resources has become less and less.Trees on the hills have been cut down, and waste water is being poured continuously into rivers.The whole ecological balance of the earth is changing.Massive destruction of environment has brought about negative effects and even poses a great threat to man’s existence.We must face the situation that exists and take actions to solve our environmental problems.We hope that all these measures will be effective and bring back a healthful environment.Yours truly

Li Hua

第五篇：考研英語(yǔ)大作文修改范例

考研英語(yǔ)大作文修改范例

原文：

From this picture, we can see a farmer planting the corn, he works hard and then he could drink a drop of water.Life is also like this.Our life is just like drinking a cup of tea, you feel the bitterness, and then sweet after taste could be get after bitterness.Life is not always so smooth, you might come across frustration and sadness, failure and even disaster, but you must be brave and stick on your dream.If you worked hard on your dream and tried your best to make it come true, you must get the sweet after bitterness.Therefore, once you have a dream or when you do something, please don’t give up, stick it on and you would be successful after that.修改以后的文章：

As is vividly depicted in the picture, we can see a farmer planting the corn.He should work hard so that he could drink a drop of water.Life has something common with this phenomenon.Our life is just like drinking a cup of tea, you may feel the bitterness at the first sip, and then the sweetness.We should believe sweetness can be got after bitterness.Life is not always smooth;therefore, you may come across frustration and sadness, failure and even disaster.If you can hold out, stick to your dream and continue to strive for it, you will definitely get a bright future and an upgraded life.In addition, once you have a dream or feel like doing something important to you, please don’t give up when there are some difficulties or obstacles on your way to success.As the old saying goes, “No pains, no gains.” If you try to avoid the arduous course of realizing your ideal and make hardly any efforts, you will never enjoy the feeling of being successful.