第一篇:現代版搞笑話劇 白雪公主
《白雪公主》現代搞笑版話劇劇本首先感謝大家配合我的工作,請大家多多指教,如有任何問題歡迎與我聯系 由于14號就要確定節目和人員了,希望大家抓緊看下劇本,選下角色。各位辛苦了!
*PS:現在道具和場務職位空缺,歡迎同學們報名
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人物:皇后(一人)、魔鏡(一人)
007(一人)
白雪公主(一人)
小矮人(若干)、王子(一人)
旁白:李彬彬
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第一場
旁白:很久很久以前,有一位艷麗的皇后,但在艷麗的背后卻藏著一顆嫉妒的心,只要聽說有人比她漂亮,她都無法忍受。她有一面魔鏡,經常走到鏡子面前自我欣賞。
(皇后、魔鏡上)
皇后:像我這樣優雅的女人,要時刻保持良好的形象,像我就隨時準備了一塊魔鏡。
魔鏡: 征婚網 7,520(旁白:親,我愛你)24小時熱情為您服務,英文服務請按1,漢語服務請按2。
皇后:這真是一塊啰嗦的鏡子,魔鏡魔鏡tell me,世界上誰最美麗? 魔鏡:除了鳳姐就是你。
旁白:又過了十年,王后又在問……
皇后:魔鏡魔鏡tell me,世界上誰最美麗?
魔:長江后浪推前浪,前浪死在沙灘上。我這有三個選項,你都想知道? 皇后:快說!
魔:A白雪公主
皇后:這不是那個小雜種嘛,B呢?
魔:B白雪公主
皇后:你敢耍我?信不信我廢了你!(扔開了鏡子)007,我的007!(疾呼)007:喳——(清朝臣子儀式)
皇后:你認識白雪公主嗎?
007:她是我們少男的夢中情人,誰又不認識?
皇后:我呢,我的武士?
007:這…
皇后:說!
007:你永遠活在我心中!
皇后:好!我命令你,給我聽好了——去把白雪公主帶到森林里,偷偷殺掉!然后把她的心和舌頭挖出來,哈哈,下酒吃!
007:喳!
第二場
旁:在一個月黑風高,伸手不見五指的夜晚,白雪公主的小強走丟了,她找啊找,找啊找,找啊找…就來到了森林。武士松開了手中的小強……
白雪公主(白):啊!小強~我終于找到你了!媽媽擔心死你了,走,回家去。007:慢著!(抽劍中)
白:O BA~~
007:?(劍掉)
白:哇!你會耍劍?
007:廢話,我不止會耍劍,我還練就了人劍合一,人送外號劍人!(pose中)
實話跟你說,我是來要你命的!
白:O BA~~~
007:其實,我是開玩笑的!哈哈哈,不過王后要你的舌頭和心臟下酒,這和怎么辦?
(突然一只野豬飛{板凳}入舞臺,武士沖上去“打~”{李小龍聲})
007:這只野豬派上用場了~嘿嘿,~see you!(飛吻)
第三場
場景:一間小房子(用凳子代替)
旁白:森林里住著四個可愛的小矮人,一天他們遇到了迷路的白雪公主。四個矮人:(齊唱《愛情三十六計》)是誰說漂亮的女生沒大腦,只懂得愛美和睡覺。(一起背對觀眾擺POSS)耶!
矮人A:反了反了。
四個矮人:(正對觀眾擺POSS)耶!
(這時候白雪公主上場)
白雪公主:那我可以跟你們宅一塊嗎?
四個矮人:Of COUSE!
(四個矮人與白雪公主一起跳舞。音樂《當我們宅一塊》)
第四場
旁白:這天,三個矮人出去了,家里只剩下只有白雪公主一個人。惡毒的皇后終于找到了白雪公主。她用買到的一日喪命散和含笑半步顛精心制作了一個有毒的蘋果,想毒死白雪公主。
(皇后上)
皇:賣蘋果了!又香又甜的iPhone4s只要299了!你還在等什么,趕快拿起電話搶購吧!(遇見白)
皇:姑娘,買個蘋果吧?
白:我不能吃你的蘋果,我,沒有錢。
皇:沒關系,你長的如花似玉,美若天仙,秀色可餐,唇紅齒白,吃了我的蘋果,我的蘋果便會身價百倍,我就會賺到更多的錢,幫幫我吧~
白:這可是你說的。(拿起個蘋果要了一口)好吃,真好吃。等等····怎么有蟲!還是半條!啊(暈了過去)
皇:哈哈!這是傳說中的天蠶,你就永遠沉睡下去吧!(消失在空氣中)
第五場
旁白:四個小矮人回到家里,看見白雪公主不省人事,非常地著
急。
矮人A:白雪公主,你這是怎么了?怎么吐白沫了?
矮人B、C:白雪公主,白雪公主...矮人C:快,快送醫院啊。(矮人們一起抬白雪公主,但是他們抬不動)矮人A:這比豬還沉呢!
矮人B:怎么辦啊?
(王子上場)
王子:(沖上去,要抱起白雪公主,但抱了兩次都抱不動。用手扶起白雪公主的頭。獨唱《唯一》),oh baby 你就是我的唯一,兩個世界都變形, 回去談和容易確定你就是我的唯一…(音樂起,王子獨唱,不停地晃白雪公主的身體)(四個小矮人哭)
小白:(突然醒了,坐起來,深情的)啊,我的王子!
白雪公主與王子.主 唱《梁山伯與朱麗葉》
四個小矮:(牽手走到小白和王子的身后唱歌)
王子:我愛你 你是我的茱麗葉 我愿意變成你的梁山伯合幸福的每一天 浪漫的每一夜
白雪公主:把愛 永遠 不放開
王子:I LOVE YOU
白雪公主:我愛你 你是我的羅蜜歐 我愿意變成你的祝英臺合:幸福的每一天 浪漫的每一夜
合:美麗的愛情祝福著未來
旁白:公主和王子從此過著幸福的生活.
第二篇:現代版搞笑話劇_白雪公主
人物:皇后(一人)、魔鏡(一人)許樂水 007(一人)梅靈婧 白雪公主(一人)王月童
小矮人(若干)A宋沁蓓 B葉億 C黃月影 D樓嘉慧、王子(一人)鄭雅 旁白:一人 道具:
———————————————————————————————————————————————— 第一場
旁白:很久很久以前,有一位艷麗的皇后,但在艷麗的背后卻藏著一顆嫉妒的心,只要聽說有人比她漂亮,她都無法忍受。她有一面魔鏡,經常走到鏡子面前自我欣賞。
(皇后、魔鏡上)
皇后(奸笑):哦呵呵呵~像我這樣優雅的女人,要時刻保持良好的形象,像我就隨時準備了一塊魔鏡。
魔鏡: 征婚網24小時熱情為您服務,英文服務請按1,漢語服務請按2。皇后:這真是一塊啰嗦的鏡子,魔鏡魔鏡tell me,世界上誰最美麗? 魔鏡:除了鳳姐就是你。
旁白:又過了十年,王后又在問…… 皇后:魔鏡魔鏡tell me,世界上誰最美麗?
魔:長江后浪推前浪,前浪死在沙灘上。我這有三個選項,你都想知道? 皇后:快說!魔:A白雪公主
皇后:這不是那個小雜種嘛,B呢? 魔:B白雪公主
皇后:你敢耍我?信不信我廢了你!(扔開了鏡子)007,我的007!(疾呼)007:喳——奴才在(清朝臣子儀式)皇后:你認識白雪公主嗎?
007:她是我們少男的夢中情人,誰又不認識? 皇后:我呢,我的武士? 007:這… 皇后:說!
007:你永遠活在我心中!
皇后:好!我命令你,給我聽好了——去把白雪公主帶到森林里,偷偷殺掉!然后把她的心和舌頭挖出來,哈哈,下酒吃!007:喳!
第二場
旁:在一個月黑風高,伸手不見五指的夜晚,白雪公主的小狗狗走丟了,她找啊找,找啊找,找啊找…就來到了森林。武士松開了手中的小狗狗……
白雪公主(白):啊!狗兒~我終于找到你了!媽媽擔心死你了,走,回家去。007:慢著!(抽劍中)白:O BA~~ 007:?(劍掉)白:哇!你會耍劍?
007:廢話,我不止會耍劍,我還練就了人劍合一,人送外號劍人!(pose中)實話跟你說,我是來要你命的!白:O BA~~~ 007:其實,我是開玩笑的!哈哈哈,不過王后要你的舌頭和心臟下酒,這可怎么辦?
(武士看了看周圍,撿起小狗狗,沖上去“打~”{李小龍聲})007:這只小狗派上用場了~嘿嘿,~see you!(飛吻)
第三場 場景:一間小房子(用凳子代替)
旁白:森林里住著四個可愛的小矮人,一天他們遇到了迷路的白雪公主。(音樂《天鵝湖》起,矮人排一隊跳天鵝湖上,《天鵝湖》停)四個矮人:(一起背對觀眾擺POSS)耶!
(矮人B急急忙忙跑上場)矮人B:哎呀!反了反了!四個矮人:(正對觀眾擺POSS)耶!(這時候白雪公主上場)
白雪公主:(指著房子)莫非這里有人住?(大聲問)有人嗎?
矮人A:你是誰啊?你是那個部隊的?
白雪公主:我是白雪公主,紅四方面軍的。(四個矮人跑到白雪公主面前)
矮人B:(指著白雪公主)真的嗎?
白雪公主:真的,不信驗驗!
矮人B:天王蓋地虎。
白雪公主:寶塔鎮河妖。
矮人C:你的臉怎么紅了?
白雪公主:容光煥發。
矮人A:怎么又黃了?
白雪公主:防寒涂的臘。
三個矮人:(互相看著說)對了,對了。
白雪公主:(拉著矮人的手蹦著說)終于找到你們了!
矮人D:同志們都安全嗎?
白雪公主:嗯,安全安全。同志們都很想念你們。我在這里迷路了。
矮人D:沒關系,到我們家吧。(矮人和白雪公主一起下)
第四場 旁白:這天,三個矮人出去了,家里只剩下只有白雪公主一個人。惡毒的皇后終于找到了白雪公主。她用買到的一日喪命散和含笑半步顛精心制作了一個有毒的蘋果,想毒死白雪公主。(皇后上)
皇:賣蘋果了!又香又甜的iPhone5只要299了!你還在等什么,趕快拿起電話搶購吧!(遇見白)皇:姑娘,買個蘋果吧?
白:我不能吃你的蘋果,我,沒有錢。
皇:沒關系,你長的如花似玉,美若天仙,秀色可餐,唇紅齒白,吃了我的蘋果,我的蘋果便會身價百倍,我就會賺到更多的錢,幫幫我吧~ 白:這可是你說的。(拿起個蘋果咬了一口)好吃,真好吃。等等····怎么有蟲!還是半條!啊(暈了過去)
皇:哈哈!這是傳說中的天蠶,你就永遠沉睡下去吧!(奸笑著下場)
第五場
旁白:四個小矮人回到家里,看見白雪公主不省人事,非常地著急。
矮人A:白雪公主,你這是怎么了?怎么吐白沫了? 矮人B、C:白雪公主,白雪公主...矮人D:快,快送醫院啊。(矮人們一起抬白雪公主,但是他們抬不動)矮人A:這比豬還沉呢!矮人B:怎么辦啊?(王子上場)
王子:(沖上去,要抱起白雪公主,但抱了兩次都抱不動。用手扶起白雪公主的頭。獨唱《唯一》),oh baby 你就是我的唯一,兩個世界都變形, 回去談和容易
確定你就是我的唯一…(音樂起,王子獨唱,不停地晃白雪公主的身體)
(四個小矮人哭)
白雪公主:(揉著眼睛)哪位英雄救了我?哪位英雄救了我?(矮人們指向王子,白雪公主走了過去,摟住王子的胳膊)
矮人A:遭殃了吧!
矮人B:倒霉了吧!
矮人C:后悔了吧!
矮人D:哈哈哈哈!
王子:這回賠大了!算了,你們幫我找到了公主,我完成你們每人一個愿望。
矮人A:真的嗎?那我先來。我其實不想要別的,我只是想要很多很多的錢!
王子:行!(從兜里拿出一把鑰匙給矮人A)金庫鑰匙。
矮人A:啊,啊,我有錢了!我有錢了!
矮人B:(迫不及待的)該我了該我了,我一直想要一部手機,以前我想要一部翻蓋的,喂,喂,時尚漂亮。后來我想要一部直板的,喂,喂,簡潔大方。現在我想要一部滑蓋的,喂,喂,白雪公主...
白雪公主:(作打電話狀)白馬王子。
王子:行!(從兜里拿出手機)給,諾基亞N93,(緊湊的說)通過ISO9002國家認證體系擁有GPRS全球衛星定位系統只要你出門大喊一聲啊!全世界都能聽得到。
矮人B:啊,我終于有手機了。
王子:(指著矮人C)該你了。
矮人C:啊,該我了嗎?(作禱告的姿勢)那我就希望世界和平好了。
王子:嗯...嗯...你還有其他問題嗎?
矮人C:哦,這個是難了一點。那...那就讓我變得高一點吧!
王子:還是剛才那個問題吧。
矮人D:世界和平?這么有型?!
王子:不管他了,(對白雪公主)那就把這個愿望給你吧白雪公主。
白雪公主:我嗎?那我就希望皇后能變得更漂亮些。
齊:為什么?
白雪公主:(面向觀眾)雖然她想害我,但我還是希望母后能開心起來。不要把外在的美麗看得很重要,其實真正的美麗是藏在每個人心里的。我們每個人都很美麗,只要把你的愛心多去獻給其他人,讓別人感受到你的愛,那么你就是最美麗的人!
王子:說得對,外在美是次要的,心靈美才是重要的。我現在才知道,原來我找到了世上最美麗的人。(王子拉著公主的手,三個矮人鼓掌)
旁白:從此,白雪公主和王子過上了幸福快樂的生活。(放音樂“你是風兒我是沙,纏纏綿綿走天涯??”全體演員上場謝幕)
第三篇:白雪公主英文搞笑話劇
http://www.tmdps.cn/programs/view/o12KwEDtlyY/isRenhe=1
白雪公主英文搞笑話劇
The snow white story
角色:公主 皇后 墨鏡 旁白 兩個矮人 獵人(可一人演兩個)
旁白紀力:Once upon a time, there was a queen.She had a pretty daughter named Snow White.Soon after the child was born, the queen died.The king married another queen.The stepmother was very jealous and cruel.She treated Snow White badly.公主宏:(出場,)唱:【I'm a cute cute girl with a bad bad mom.It's a big big thing if you love me.選自big big world】My horror mother always obliges me, such a beautiful,handsome,humor smart,lovely,delicious princess to do a lot of homework?oh I cannot bear it.So I just make a brilliant decision: running away~ 唱:【go go go oleo le ole選自世界杯主題曲 】(離開)
皇后粘(上場):I’m the legendary cruel queen , oh,no the legendary beautiful、greedy、bloody queen.If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her.I have a magic mirror.If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here!
魔鏡朝全:(跑上來,雙手叉腰)Yes, I’m coming.What do you want to know?
皇后粘:Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Tell me the truth, who is the most beautiful woman in the world?
魔鏡朝全:歌:【everytime I try to lie I fail without my heart,I feel so sad,】You are really the fairest of all, I think.{ 皇后,你的確是非常漂亮的女人。}
皇后粘:General啦{一般啦}(舉雙手)哈哈哈!哈哈哈!I am the most beautiful woman in the world!
魔鏡朝全: But,nevertheless,however,whereas, 可是,可是,(邊說邊退,舉手擋住臉)there is a young lady.She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.皇后粘:(抓狂樣):She is much more beautiful than me? 歌:【my jealousness is killing me and I,and I must confess,I’m still paining.選在布蘭妮的baby baby more time】Who is she? Tell me quickly!
魔鏡朝全: She is Snow White.皇后粘:Snow White? No, I’m the most beautiful in the world.??(沉思)(響指)hunter!come here, come here!
獵人偉新: Here!(敬禮 少息立正)
皇后粘:I heard Snow White had fleeted from my palace.I order you to find her out and kill her.獵人偉新:But she is the princess.Even given money, I would not do such immoral things.{即使給錢,我也不會做這樣不道德的事情。}
皇后:(抽出鈔票,揮著下臺)
獵人偉新:(兩眼發直,追隨鈔票)Oh money!
公主和獵人上場。
獵人偉新:You must be Snow White.公主和獵人追逐半場。公主: In the night which you can’t see your toe if you stretch out your hand.{在一個伸手不見腳趾的夜晚},(聲音提起)He ,he he he{他,他他他}??He grasped my left hand {他抓住了我的左手},(獵人抓公主左手)And then,he he he?He also grasped my right hand {然后,他,他他??他又抓住了我的右手},(二人轉180度,獵人抓公主右手)(公主害羞狀)He invited me to dance.獵人偉新:歌:【take me to your heart ,take me to your soul ,give me your hand before I'm old 選自吻別】Although I don’t have the heart to kill you, your mother want me to.(拿刀欲刺狀)
公主:(雙手合于胸前)My dear hunter, I admire you just like the yellow river, never endless.I have eighty-year-old mother up, three-year-old boy down.Please don’t kill me.Give me the life, please!我親愛的獵人,我對你的敬意有如滔滔江水連綿不絕。我上有老,下有小。請別殺我,給我一條活路吧!
獵人偉新:No way.Give me your life.(舉刀刺向公主,忽然,捂住自己的肚子,自語)Maybe I ate too much this morning, Maybe there is something wrong with the rice.(抬頭)where is the toilet?
公主:T-o-i-l-e-t-? 獵人偉新:WC.公主:W-C-?
獵人偉新:(急)茅廁!Are you happy to hear such rude words? 公主:I know, I know.Turn left, left and left.獵人偉新(下場)公主(之后下場)
旁白紀力:Princess continued to begin her life of escaping.{公主又繼續開始逃亡的生活} A week later.there was a small girls running panic in the dark forest {在一個伸手不見五指的夜里,漆黑的森林里有一個小女孩驚慌的跑著}。
公主:(上場,跑圈)Help!
旁白紀力:Snow White Looked haggard and worn rags running unceasingly Suddenly, she found a little house.她衣衫襤褸,面色憔悴,不時地回頭張望,腳下卻不敢停留。忽然間,她發現前面有一座小房子.(公主伸手求救狀,推門)
公主:Eat!Bread should!Apple also!wa kao!Leaves also can’t be left out.{吃的!面包也要!蘋果也要!我kao,菜葉子也不放過!}
旁白天驕:The Snow White was sitting on the chair eating crazily.Half an hour later.{公主坐在椅子上開吃,半小時過去}.公主:(打嗝)
旁白天驕:After eating and drinking,she felt very weary and wanted to have a rest.So she quikly fell asleep.{吃過喝過之后,她覺得非常疲倦,想休息休息,就很快就睡著了??}
旁白天驕: When it was dark, the owners of the cottage came back.They were two dwarfs.They were digging treasure in the mountain.{不久,房子的主人們回來了,他們是七個在山里小矮人}.(小矮人上)
B:wait,wait,Let’s go into our cottage silently.A:(踢門,看到公主喊)dinosaur!(拉手,蹭入)
B:Dinosaur!beat!{恐龍!打!}
公主:Don’t beat me in my face!Don’t beat me in my face!{別打我臉,別打我臉~~ } B:(拿燈照公主狀)
B:Stop{停!}(眾人后跳一步,公主起,望眾人)
A:Wa!Beaty!{哇,美女} What a lovely child!How beautiful!B:Who are you?
公主:Ladies and gentlemen.I am Snow White.I am 16 years old.Now I am on kindergarten and still not married.先生們,女士們。我叫白雪公主,今年15歲,上幼稚園,還沒有結婚。
旁白天驕:Princess told the whole process of the story to the dwarfs.{公主把事情的經過告訴了矮人們}Then the dwarfs began to discuss whether to keep Snow White back.{此時,七個小矮人討論是否留下白雪公主}
公主:(欲聽眾人決定,雙手放在耳朵處)
B: I think she might stay with us.A:I agree with you,Hey girl, don't be afraid, we will help you and beat the bad queen.公主:You are so kind to me!{你們對我太好了!}
旁白天驕:From then on, Snow White kept the house.On the other hand, the queen didn’t receive the hunter’s information.She was anxious like the ants in her pants, grabbing the wall.皇后等不到獵人的消息,她急得如熱鍋上的螞蟻,直撓墻。
皇后上場(很傻地跳舞,撓墻狀)
旁白天驕:The wicked queen took out the mirror。
魔鏡上場。
皇后:(蹭魔鏡)Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of all?
魔鏡:歌:【Every time you look at me ,My heart is jumping, it's easy to see選自布蘭妮crazy】You are the fairest of all.But Snow White is still alive and well.But, however, whereas, nevertheless ,(一邊擺手,退,逃)She lives with the two dwarfs.No one is more beautiful than she.{你仍然很漂亮,但是,但是白雪公主比你還漂亮。}
皇后:(抓頭)No!Snow White must die.I must finish her in person even if it costs my life.Just keep calm, Let me see!(盤坐在地。兩手在頭上畫畫如一休)歌:【格嘰格嘰格嘰格嘰格嘰格嘰?】(皇后站起)Ok,I get one.旁白偉新:The queen made a poisonous apple and dressed herself like an old woman.She came to the cottage.皇后:Good things to sell.Pretty things to sell.Cheap.Very cheap.公主:Hi, good day, my good lady.What do you sell?
皇后:Apples.Very delicious apples!Do you want to have a taste? 公主:Do you have some oranges ?你有橘子嗎?
皇后:Do you want some apples?
公主:Do you have some oranges?你有橘子么?
皇后:(大聲)My question is that: Do you have any oranges ?Oh, no, Do you want some apples? 公主:哦,apple呀??Do you have some oranges?
(皇后逼近公主,把蘋果塞在公主嘴里)
公主:(正經狀)It is poisonous!(閉眼,倒,坐椅子上)
(皇后大笑)哈哈哈!哈哈哈!Now I’m the most beautiful in the world.I have a dream that one day,I can be the most beautiful woman in the world.旁白偉新:Snow White died.When the three dwarfs came from work.They were greatly surprise to see Snow White dead.(小矮人上,見公主,圍半圓)
A:(揣公主)Hey!Don’t sleep like a pig!Go to work!嘿,豬,別睡了,快干活!(見其無反應,試其鼻息,做白癡狀)
B:She died!What’s the matter?
A:(摸之,做驚恐狀,看B)Oh, my God!Who did it? It must be the wicked queen.AB:歌:【wherever you go, whatever you do ,I will be right here waiting for you選自此情可待】(唱完,眾人掩面而泣,同時用手指彈眼淚給對方)
旁白偉新: Although Snow White had been dead a long, long time.She looked as if she was living.She looked as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.However, one day, it happened a prince came to the two dwarfs’ house.When he saw Snow White, he fell in love with her.王子:Please, let me have Snow White.I love her.I want her to be my wife.A: May I have your name, please?(懷有敵意的說)
王子:(從兜里掏出一卷衛生紙遞給A)It is my business card.A:(舉起來看看,驚訝狀!)Prince
A:Ok!Carry Snow White with you to your palace.Be sure to be kind to her.王子:(對著公主作深情狀)Sure, I will.I will love you forever, my dear!I love you just like the mouse likes the rice.You are the one I first kissed, and I hope you will be the last one.(Kiss her用手捂住公主的嘴 親自己的手)
旁白偉新:As soon as the prince kissed Snow White, Snow White came to her life.公主:Oh, my heaven!Where am I? What had happened? 歌【 You drive me crazy ,I just cant sleep ,Im so excited, I'm in too deep】
王子:You are with me, my dear.I love you.I love you more than everything in the world.Please be my wife, will you?
公主:Yes, I will, my dear!
王子:(又是深情狀,手唔心臟,轉向遠方)My lovely lady,Once there was a truest love put before my eyes ,but I didn't cherish it.Only after losing it.I found myself regretting.No pains in the world comes near this, if God Could give me another chance, I would say to the girl “I love you!“If there had to be a limit of time before the end of love.I hope it would be ten thousand years.曾經,有一份真誠的愛情放在我面前,我沒有珍惜,等到我失去的時候才后悔莫及,人世間最痛苦的事莫過于此,如果上天能夠給我一個再來一次的機會,我會對那個女孩子說三個字: “我愛你。”如果非要在這份愛上加上一個期限,我希望是一萬年!歌【Near...far...Wherever you are,I believe That the heart does go on 選自我心永恒】
三矮人:Oh!Congratulations!Congratulations!
旁白偉新:The prince took Snow White to the palace.Their wedding was held with great show.The story is ended, thank you!謝幕。
第四篇:白雪公主英文搞笑話劇
白雪公主英文搞笑話劇
第一場
旁白:Once upon a time, there was a queen.She had a pretty daughter named Snow White.Soon after the child was born, the queen died.The kind married another queen.The stepmother was very jealous and cruel.She treated Snow White badly.在很久很久以前,有一個皇后,她有一個名叫白雪公主的可愛女兒。在這個孩子出生不久,皇后就去世了。國王娶了另外一個皇后,這個后媽很妒忌別人和殘忍。她對待白雪公主的態度非常壞。公主:(出場,)唱:【I'm a cute cute girl with a bad bad mom.It's a big big thing if you love me.選自big big world】My horror mother always obliges me, such a beautiful,handsome,humor,smart,lovely,kind princess to do a lot of homework…oh I cannot bear it.So I just make a brilliant decision: running away(離開)我恐怖的后媽總是逼我這樣一個美麗,帥氣,幽默,聰明,可愛,善良的公主去做很多的作業……噢,我不能忍受了。所以,我就做了一個很明智的選擇:離開這里。皇后(上場):I’m the legendary cruel queen , oh,no,it’sthe legendary beautiful、greedy、bloody queen.If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her.I have a magic mirror.If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here!我就是傳授中殘忍的皇后,噢,不,是傳說中美麗,貪婪、嗜血的皇后。如果有人比我更美麗,我就會殺了她。我有一個魔鏡,如果我想知道一些東邪,它一定會告訴我。現在,魔鏡,魔鏡,來這里!
魔鏡:(跑上來,雙手叉腰)Yes, I’m coming.What do you want to know?是的,我來了,你想知道些什么? 皇后:Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Tell me the truth, who is the most beautiful woman in the world?咒語,告訴我真相,誰是世界上最美麗的女人?
魔鏡: You are really the fairest of all, I think.皇后,我想你的確是非常漂亮的女人。
皇后:General(舉雙手)哈哈哈!哈哈哈!I am the most beautiful woman in the world!一般啦,哈哈哈哈哈哈,我是世界上最美麗的女人!
魔鏡: But,nevertheless,however,whereas,(邊說邊退,舉手擋住臉)there is a young lady.She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.可是,可是,,可是,有一個年輕的女士,她就是白雪公主,紅得如玫瑰,黑得如烏木。她比你美麗更多倍!皇后:(抓狂樣):She is much more beautiful than me? Who is she? Tell me quickly!她比我更美麗得多?她是誰?快點告訴我
魔鏡:I say again.She is Snow White.我再說一次,她是白雪公主。
皇后:Snow White? No, I’m the most beautiful in the world.……(沉思)(響指)hunter!come here, come here!白雪公主?不,我是世界上最美麗的人……獵人,來這里,來這里!
獵人: Here!(敬禮 少息立正)我在這里!
皇后:I heard Snow White haddisappearance from my palace.I order you to find her out and kill her.我聽說白雪公主從我的地盤消失了,我命令你去把她找出來,然后殺掉她。
獵人:But she is the princess.Even given money, I would not do such immoral things.但是她是公主,即使給錢,我也不會做這樣不道德的事情。
皇后:(抽出鈔票,揮著下臺)
獵人:(兩眼發直,追隨鈔票)Oh money!噢,錢啊!公主和獵人上場。第二場
獵人:You must be Snow White.你一定是白雪公主!
公主和獵人追逐半場。Although I don’t have the heart to kill you,but,your mother want me to.(拿刀欲刺狀)雖然我沒有要殺你的心,但是你媽媽想我這樣做。
公主:(雙手合于胸前)My dear hunter, I admire you just like the yellow river, never endless.I have eighty-year-old mother up, three-year-old boy down.Please don’t kill me.Give me the life, please!我親愛的獵人,我對你的敬意有如滔滔江水連綿不絕。我上有老,下有小。請別殺我,給我一條活路吧!獵人:No way.Give me your life.(舉刀刺向公主,忽然,捂住自己的肚子,自語)Maybe I ate too much this morning,Maybe there is something wrong with the rice.(抬頭)where is the toilet?不行,把你的生命給我。或許我今天早上吃太多了,或許米飯有點問題。哪里有廁所? 公主:T-o-i-l-e-t-? 獵人:WC.廁所。
公主:W-C-? 獵人:(急)WC!Are you happy to hear such rude words?廁所啊!你很開心聽到這樣粗如的單詞嗎? 公主:I know, I know.Turn left, left and left.我知道,我知道,轉左,轉左,再轉左 第三場
旁白:Princess continued to begin her life of escaping.A week later.In the night which you can’t see your five fingers if you stretch out your hand, there was a small girls running panic in the dark forest公主又繼續開始逃亡的生活。在一個伸手不見五指的夜里,漆黑的森林里有一個小女孩驚慌的跑著。公主:(上場,跑圈)Help!救命!
旁白:Snow White Looked haggard and weared rags running unceasingly Suddenly,she found a little house.她衣衫襤褸,面色憔悴,不時地回頭張望,腳下卻不敢停留。忽然間,她發現前面有一座小房子.(公主伸手求救狀,推門)
公主:Eat!Bread should!Apple also!wa kao!Leaves also can’t be left out.吃的!面包也要!蘋果也要!我kao,菜葉子也不放過!旁白:The Snow White was sitting on the chair eating crazily.Half an hour later.公主坐在椅子上開吃,半小時過去。公主:(打嗝)
旁白:After eating and drinking,she felt very weary and wanted to have a rest.So she quikly fell asleep.吃過喝過之后,她覺得非常疲倦,想休息休息,就很快就睡著了……
旁白: When it was dark, the owners of the cottage came back.They were seven dwarfs.They were digging treasure in the mountain.不久,房子的主人們回來了,他們是七個在山里小矮人.(小矮人上)
:Turn left(眾人隨便轉)Number off(眾人胡報)向左~轉!報數!: oh my god……
:I’m the Happy.I’m the happiest person in the world.我是快樂的。我是世界上最幸福的人。:I’m the Sneezy.If I sneeze, the earth will shake.我是打噴嚏。如果我打噴嚏,地球會動搖。:Look, the lamp in our house is on!看,我們房子里有燈亮著!:Who is in it?誰在里面? :Perhaps it’s the ghost!或許是鬼!
:Let’s go into our cottage silently.讓我們一起靜靜地進去。:(踢門,看到公主喊)Dinosaur!(拉手,蹭入)恐龍!
:Dinosaur!beat!恐龍!打!
公主:Don’t beat me in my face!Don’t beat me in my face!別打我臉,別打我臉~~ :(拿燈照公主狀)
旁白: When dwarfs was holding the candle and let the light fall on little snow-white.They all cried out with astonishment.當小矮人手持蠟燭,并讓團小小的雪白的光下降。他們都驚訝地叫了出來。:Stop(眾人后跳一步,公主起,望眾人)停!
:Wa!Beaty!What a lovely child!How beautiful!哇,美女!多么可愛的小孩!多美麗啊!:Who are you?你是誰?
: Where are you from?你從哪里來?
: Why are you coming here?你為什么要到這里?
公主:Ladies and gentlemen.I am Snow White.I am 16 years old.Now I am on kindergarten and still not married.The truth is that先生們,女士們。我叫白雪公主,今年15歲,上幼稚園,還沒有結婚。事情其實這樣的…… 旁白:Princess told the whole process of the story to the dwarfs.Then the dwarfs began to discuss wether
to keep Snow White back.公主把事情的經過告訴了矮人們此時,七個小矮人討論是否留下白雪公主 公主:(欲聽眾人決定,雙手放在耳朵處)
:It is a deal!Where there is difficulty,there is help!Even if there doesn’t have any difficulty,we nust make one and go to help!就這么辦!有困難要幫,沒有困難,制造困難也要幫呀~~~~ : If you do some cooking for us.If you make the beds for us.如果你可以為我們煮飯,為我們鋪床。
:If you do some washing, you can stay with us.如果你可以為我們洗衣服,你就可以留在這里,同我們一起居住。
:But you must be careful.但是你要小心!
:Don’t go out.Don’t let anyone come in.Your stepmother will find you and kill you.不要出去,不要讓任何人進來,你的后媽會把你找到然后殺了你。
公主:You are so kind to me!你們對我太好了!
旁白:From then on, Snow White kept the house.When the three dwarfs came back, she had everything prepared.On the other hand, the queen didn’t receive the hunter’s information.She was anxious.從此,白雪公主就住在了小屋里。另一方面,皇后等不到獵人的消息,她很急。第四場
皇后上場
旁白:The wicked queen took out the mirror。邪惡的王后拿出魔鏡。魔鏡上場。
皇后:(蹭魔鏡)Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the most beautiful in the world?咒語,誰是世界上最美麗的人?
魔鏡: You are the most beautiful in the world.But, however, whereas, nevertheless , Snow White is still alive and well.(一邊擺手,退,逃)She lives with the seven dwarfs.No one is more beautiful than she.你是世界上最美麗的人,但是,但是,但是,白雪公主還活著,她跟七個小矮人住在一起,沒有人比她更美麗。皇后:(抓頭)No!Snow White must die.I had to let her disappear in the world.keep calm, Let me see!(皇后站起)Ok,I get one!不,白雪公主必須死,我必須讓她在世界上消失。保持冷靜,讓我想想!好,我想到一個辦法了!
旁白:The queen made a poisonous apple and dressed herself like an old woman.She came to the cottage.王后做了有毒的蘋果和一個老婦人打扮自己。她來到了山寨。
皇后:Good things to sell.Pretty things to sell.Cheap.Very cheap.有好東西賣,有好東西賣,便宜啊,非常便宜的。
公主:Hi, my good lady.What do you sell?你好,我親愛的女士,你要賣什么?
皇后:Apples.Very delicious apples!Do you want to have a taste?蘋果,很美味的蘋果!你想試一下嗎? 公主:Do you have anycarrots?你有胡蘿卜嗎? 皇后:Do you want some apples?你想要一些蘋果嗎? 公主:Do you have any carrots?你有胡蘿卜么?
皇后:(大聲)My question is that: Do you have any carrots?Oh,no,no,no,Do you want some apples?我要問的問題是:你有一些胡蘿卜嗎?噢,不,不,不,是你想要些蘋果嗎? 公主:Oh,apple……Do you have any carrots?噢,你有些胡蘿卜嗎?(皇后逼近公主,把蘋果塞在公主嘴里)
公主:(正經狀)It is poisonous!(閉眼,倒,坐椅子上)它是有毒的!
(皇后大笑)哈哈哈!哈哈哈!Now I’m the most beautiful in the world.I have a dream today!I have a dream that one day,I can be the most beautiful woman in the world.現在我是世界上美麗的人,我的夢想實現了,我的夢想有實現的一天,我成為世界上最美麗的人了!
旁白:Sn ow White's death is like a star across the midnight.After so many years whenever I look up to the lonely night sky。When the seven dwarfs came from work.They were greatly surprise to see Snow White
dead.白雪公主的死就像流星劃過子夜,多年后每當我仰望寂寞的星空,總會想起這樣一句話:“有的人的死重于泰山,而有的人的死則輕于鴻毛,輕于鴻毛……當七個小矮人下班回來,他們非常驚訝的看到白雪公主死了。
旁白: Although Snow White had been dead a long, long time.But she looked as if she was living.She looked as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.However, one day, a prince came to the seven dwarfs’ house.When he saw Snow White, he fell in love with her.雖然白雪公主死了很長時間,但是她看起來還是活生生的。她看起來白的如雪,紅的如玫瑰,黑的如烏木。但是,有一天,一個王子來到了七個小矮人的房子前。當他看見了白雪公主,他就愛上了她 第五場
王子:Please, let me marry Snow White.I love her.I want her to be my wife.請讓我娶白雪公主,我愛她,我想她成為我的妻子。
:May I have your name,please?我能知道你的名字嗎? 王子:(從兜里掏出一卷衛生紙遞給B):(看到)I’m very busy for the duels every day——The Texas Cowboy.我每天都很忙——德州牛仔。:But why should we believe you?但是我們為什么要相信你呢?
王子:I love her.I love this life will not be a second girl.我愛她,我不會再像愛她一樣愛第二個女孩。
:But she is dead.While we don’t want to admit that she was dead。但是她已經死了,雖然我們不想承認,但她已經死了
王子:(朝公主深情地看了看,抓住她的手)I would like to
become a
fairy tale the angel you love, open arms into wings to protect you, you have to believe, believe we will be like a fairy tale, happiness and joy in the end.我要變成童話里你愛的那個天使,展開雙手變成翅膀守護你,你要相信,相信我們會像童話故事里,幸福和快樂是結局。旁白:Snow White came to her life,as was written in the magic book of the wicked queen.But she turned into a tigress.白雪公主蘇醒過來了,就像邪惡的皇后的魔法書一樣神奇。但是她轉變成了一個母老虎的性格。公主:Oh,who destroyed my dreams!I feel very angry!噢,是誰吵醒了我們美夢!我感到很生氣!王子: Please forgive me, noble princess.It’s me.請饒恕我,高貴的公主,是我。
旁白: princess fanned a slap in the face of the prince.The seven dwarfs ran away.公主給了王子一個耳光,七個小矮人逃走了。
ABCDEFG: Dear Prince, we give you princess.(逃走)親愛的王子,我把公主讓給你!(白雪公主扯著王子的耳朵離開)
旁白: Later, the prince and Snow White married.But the prince's life is very tragic.最后,王子和公主結婚了,但是王子的生活卻格外的凄慘!謝幕!
第五篇:白雪公主話劇劇本
《白雪公主》話劇劇本 SW-白雪公主 Q-皇后 M-魔鏡 H-獵人P-白馬王子 D-小矮人音樂起,旁白
A long time ago, In a beautiful kingdom, there lived a young king and queen, the people loved them so much;the queen died while giving birth to a girl, her name was Snow White, She was a beautiful princess.Year passed, the king got married again, The people didn’t love the new queen, because she was cruel.One day, In the king’s palace:----白雪出場
S.w: My name is Snow white , I am a beautiful princess, I miss my mother so much, Where is my mother ? Where is my mother ?
音樂起,皇后、魔鏡出場
Q: I am a queen , I’m very beautiful , Where is Mirror ? Mirror , Mirror on the wall , who’s the most beautiful ?
M: Snow white is much more beautiful than you!
Q: Hunter, go kill Snow white.獵 人 出 場
H: Yes, my queen
音樂起,獵人追趕白雪,公主驚慌出逃
S.w: Help me ,help me, please, please!
白雪順利脫逃后
S.w: I am tried and hungry, oh, there is a little house , I will eat a little and lie down.音樂起,7個小矮人出場,D: Look, somebody ate my food----
Somebody drank my water----
Someone is sleeping now----
What a beautiful girl!----
小矮人睡覺----音樂起公主先醒了----小矮人醒了----對話
How do you do?
S.w: How do you do? My name is Snow white … Nice to meet you!
D:(齊說)Nice to meet you ,too----
welcome to our house!----
Would you like to live here?
S.W: My pleasure, thank you very much!
D: Let’s go out for our work, bye-bye, Snow white.皇后、魔鏡出場
Q: Mirror, mirror on the wall , who’s the most beautiful? M: Snow white is much more beautiful than you!
Q: What ? Snow white is not dead ? Hahaha, I got a good idea!音樂起,皇后扮演老太太出場,對話
Q: Apple ,apple, beautiful apple,S.w: Hello, Good morning grandma!
Q: pretty girl ,would you like a bite?
S.w: Oh, yes ,thank you grandma!
白雪公主咬一口后倒地
Q: The girl is dead!Hahaha…
小矮人出場、圍著公主哭
Snow white wake up, wake up…
音樂起,小矮人引著王子出場
P: A beautiful girl!She shall be my queen!
王子喚醒公主,公主醒了
P:Wake up!Wake up , my queen!
S.w: Thank you for your help!
P: My pleasure!
音樂起,小矮人、公主、王子跳起歡快的舞